Wisdom For A Child

August 7, 2022

It was another noisy night of adult voices in conflict.

It was dark. The little girl was scared.

She had her head tucked under her pillow with her wee forearm pushing it down to her ear to see if that would muffle the ruckus.

It didn’t.

Time marched on.

The little girl turned into an adolescent.

Her now bigger forearm could apply more pressure to the pillow.

As had been the case over the years, this didn’t make too much of a difference.

Her pillowcase was tear-stained and her stomach felt like it was tied up in knots as she waited for the reckless commotion to stop. She waited for the morning when the world seemed to be somewhat normal. But it wasn’t really.

It just wasn’t dark.

The adolescent turned into a young woman. She left that pillow behind. She decided a long time prior that there would be a better way.

What would I say to that little girl cowering in fear in her room in the dark?

I would tell her this:

1. You have the intestinal fortitude to conquer the hills and valleys of life. It is not always easy but you can do it.

2. Things change. Don’t expect things to always be the same. Change is growth. Don’t be afraid of it.

3. Even if you do things as perfectly as you can and do things “right”, you may still be wronged. Things may not turn out as you thought. Don’t let these inevitable truths dampen your life experience.

4. Don’t wait for other people to do things for you. Be in charge of yourself. But learn to allow people to help you. Don't be afraid to ask for help.

5. Speak up for yourself more. You can have boundaries and still be a nice person.

6. Look at yourself in wonder more often. Give yourself credit more often.

7. Let people love you.

8. Be okay with not everyone liking you.

9. You don’t have to be ashamed if your life doesn’t look like most of society. Being alone doesn’t mean that anything is wrong with you. Not having children doesn’t make you any less of a person. You are not broken in this state.

10. Don’t overthink things so much. Listen to your intuition because it is very good.

11. You deserve joy because why wouldn't you deserve it?

12. Your happiness will be finding the harmony between the light and the dark of life. Because there is both light and dark in life. There is happiness and sadness. And many other emotions. Get proficient in describing how you feel.

13. Don’t link your self-worth with others’ approval.

14. Ask to take guitar lessons instead of organ lessons. When you grow up, it is easier to take a guitar to a campfire than a keyboard.

I would tell that little girl how much I loved the way she stood up for what was right even when it was hard. I admired how she apologized when she was wrong. I respected her courage. I loved her feisty attitude. I thought she rocked the word integrity.

Lastly, I would tell her to keep going.